There are quite a few of you who absolutely deserve answers, but it’s been difficult to try and answer them all. You don’t want to know how many I have to answer. So I do apologize (also to anyone else who I haven’t answered yet).
I wish I could tell you that those that are close to you won’t really care and won’t judge you… but unfortunately, that’s not always the case. There are definitely some people who can’t get past something this. I’m not telling you this to scare you into not telling people. On the contrary. I just want to make sure you have the right mindset when you walk into the situation.
And what mindset is that? I think keeping calm and collected is a good thing. If they react poorly, the last thing you want to do is point out how they shouldn’t judge you… and that they need to accept you. While ALL of that is true… I always find it best to lay out the truth… wait for their reaction… and if they don’t take it well, then you know that you just need to give them more time.
It is true that more and more people are perfectly fine when they find out. I know a lot of people who have had their family completely accept them for who they are. And that’s awesome as fuck. :-) You may have this happen to you as well.
So how do you go about telling them? Well, even tho I was making it sound like you should tell them all at once… I’m more of a person who would tell you to tell them one at a time. I think the one-on-one aspect is really beneficial so that each person can speak with you directly. It’ll feel more intimate to speak with them that way… and if there is a bad apple in the bunch, that person won’t be able to rally others.
So I would start with the person you feel that will accept it best. Then, if you want, you can have them join you as you tell others. It’s the best way to start a support team out of your own family. :-)
Now what if they don’t accept it? Well, if you feel like that could possibly be the case… then before you start telling anyone, have a backup plan in place. What does that mean? I think it’s good idea to know what you will do if the family isn’t supportive. And this is really only important if you live at home. If you live on your own, a backup plan isn’t really necessary. If you live with them (or depend upon them for financial reasons) then you will need to consider where you will go in the OFF chance that they ask you to leave. Have this in place before you start telling anyone. Why? Because in the heat of the moment… thinking clearly is HARD to do. So it’s always better to already have a plan in place JUST in CASE something happens.
You really should be fine, but I really don’t know your family. I completely agree with you that nobody should judge you… and they should completely accept you. It’s just we don’t really live in a world where that always is the case. I wish it was… but we’re not there yet.
I’m glad you like my insane blog. That means a lot. :-D
Let me know if that helps! :-)
I’m here to do what I can. :-)
I answer as many of the questions as I can as I see them. Some questions take a little bit more time for me to think through. I try and get to as many as I can. There are hundreds to pick from.
I do enjoy listening to lana. For awhile, it was all I heard on the radio so I got a bit over the few songs I was hearing, but more lana wouldn’t be bad. :-D
I’m 36. :-)
It is different from here, but that doesn’t mean you won’t find him. You will. It will just take time. I know you hate hearing that, but it’s true.
Don’t lose hope. One day you’ll tell me all about him and how you two met. :-)
It’s just not who we’re sexually attracted to. We love men. Straight men love women. This is just how it is, really.
As far as why… I’ve never really questioned it. It would be like asking why I’m male. It just is. I’ve never really tried to dive into why I’m male. I was just born this way.
I’m not sure this helps much, but it’s really all I know. I’m gay because I was born this way. I’ve always been gay… like I’ve always been male. I was born this way.
Slowly… I’m trying… but it takes me awhile. :-/
I’ll get to them as fast as I can tho…
It’s true that people say what? I’m not sure what you mean there.
If you are turned on with the idea of a guy cumming in your ass… so be it. Embrace who you are. :-)
I think it’s cool. :-D
This is interesting. I know what you’re going through. The challenge is that you have no idea why he’s looking at you. That said, if he’s staring as much as it sounds… he may actually be wanting something more and isn’t sure how to proceed.
I’d have to caution you here. He may just be curious about things… but not interested in anything further. Directly talking to him about it may not yield any results.
I think the first thing I’d do is to reach out and just start talking to him. He may blow you off… but you won’t know that until you try it out. Don’t go TOO crazy here. Just start finding out more about him. Ask him about what he does over the weekend. Find out if he goes to the mall. Focus on friendly stuff such as that and see what happens. What will this do for you? If he IS interested in you, there’s a chance that he’ll want to hang out as well. And getting him out of the school environment may show you another side of him.
Now since you have a crush on him… you do need to be VERY careful here. It’s easy to dismiss signs that go against him liking you. So you need to go slow, be patient and see if he wants to hang out as friends. And leave it as friends for awhile. You may find that as you get to know him, he’s not what you’re looking for. Or you may find that you two are getting along more and more and you both share your feelings for each other.
This is WAY too early to tell for sure… so I can’t be certain the direction to tell you to take. I think by taking it slow and seeing if he wants to hang out with you would be the first thing I’d do.
I know you’re scared to talk to him, but you don’t have to say anything that will compromise how you feel about him. Ask him about his classes… talk to him about what’s going in the world… be friendly and see what happens. He may be a bit stand offish… but that’s ok. He may be nervous. And if he is stand offish, just leave it be. Either he’s working stuff out in his head or he’s still just not sure about things (provided he’s still staring).
Let me know if that helps!